Saturday, December 24, 2005

My Xmas Rx

No, I'm not a real doctor, and I've never played one on TV, or anywhere; but, if you're suffering from xmas overload (as opposed to Christmas) then you may want to follow my prescription anyway. I do.

Xmas has become some great daemon turning the kosmic wheel of our economy—an Archon who's job it seems to be to make sure we don't get to really experience Advent, or even Christmas. The good thing about being a bachelor is that I get out of most of the oppressive elements of xmas (aside from those xmases I worked at bookstores during college, yikes), but I realize we don't all have the option of, or want, the completely detached approach—and the moment somebody has kids, it isn't an option anymore, anyway.

So, here's my xmas prescription, I do it on Christmas morning, but I imagine that Boxing Day would work just as well. Sleep in after midnight mass, fix a nice pot of good coffee, mix liberally with Irish Cream, and watch Monty Python's Life of Brian. Substitutions on the drink can be made, of course, but a warm tasty beverage is key. Some sort of pastries or other finger food is also recommended, croissants rather than doughnuts though, who needs more sweets?

After a few long sips, and the opening sequence of The Life of Brian, I guarantee you'll feel better, maybe not much better, but hey, at least it's something. It sure helps me get over the fact that Santa never brings me that race of atomic supermen to rule the world with—I guess I'll just have to make them myself.

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